Chapter 19

Rose

*9 days later …*

The next morning, after Olena's surprise party I woke up alone in bed. Dimitri wasn't longer at my side and the bed felt empty without him. I'm ashamed to admit that I turned the apartment upside down to find him, but he wasn't there. In the end, I only found a voice mail.

“Hi Roza”, his voice engulfed me, when I picked up the phone. “When you wake up and hear this, don't be angry. Yes I am gone, but just for a while, there are some … things I need to do. See you in a while, don't worry about me. Well … Yeah, eh, bye.”

That was nine days ago and he still hasn't come back. I had no idea where he was or why he was away.

I had asked the guys and his family, but no one knew where he was, not his mother or sisters, nor his best friend Ivan. And after a week I began to worry about him.

Why not earlier? Because apparently it was “normal” for Dimitri to disappear for a few days. Nobody knew where he went or when or why, they just knew he disappeared and came back like nothing happened in the mean time.

But Ivan told me it's never been more than five days, so after the school week was over I began to worry. Whenever I tried to call Dimitri I got straight to voice mail, I tried to text him, but he never replied. During the week I thought a lot about Dimitri and I, our so called relationship, if you could even call it that. I thought about his bruises or the night none of us seemed to be able to remember. Honestly, I think I just tried to find an explanation why Dimitri had abandoned me like that, but every time I came up empty.
How could he change from “I kissed you because I wanted to” to “I'm gone and ignore your calls”. I didn't know why.

So I tried to busy myself, so I wouldn't think too much about Dimitri or his disappearance or the last time we saw each other. I spent a lot of time with my parents and at their new house, the apartment was just too quiet and lonely. But I never slept there, because every night I hoped Dimitri would sneak into my room at night, lay down beside me and pull me into his arms. Cheesy and pathetic, yes, but I still hoped it would happen. It didn't.

I couldn't sleep, of course I did sleep eventually because my body just gave out, but I slept … I don't have a word for it,: I had nightmares, my muscles always ached, because I couldn't seem to find a comfortable position. Every morning when I woke up, I felt more exhausted than relaxed, it felt like I had slept all of five minutes.

At school, Lissa and Mia kept me occupied and filled every second with some girlie talk so I never got the time to think about Dimitri. Even Eddie, Christian or Adrian tried to cheer me up and distract me. It worked most times, but not every time. I knew I behaved like some pathetic excuse of a wife who lost her husband. Dimitri was just gone for a while, not forever, I knew that, but I couldn't help but feel that way.

After a while you would think you would get used to it, being alone in the apartment and such, but I didn't and only God knows why.

Eddie kept driving me to school and drove me home afterwards, we became even closer during that time. I don't know how Eddi knew about Dimitris and my fighting exercises, but he told me he wanted me to keep learning, so we met up everyday at 3pm and practiced. His training wasn't like Dimitris at all, but not in a bad way, I liked it very much and I think I even improved at least a little. The first three days I felt like hell, but it became better after some time and I grew used to it.

And while Dimitri was gone Mason did a 180 and was suddenly at my side, every time I needed him or well, didn't need him, he was there. He apologized and asked if we could start over and so we did. I'm happy to have him back in my life, but all in all it was really weird. He and Eddie were there almost 24/7 and they both became really good friends.

The only person I barely saw was Ivan.

“Where are you?”, Mason asked.

“Huh?”

He chuckled lightly.

“You got that look again. Where are you with your thoughts?”, he asked again, smiling brightly.

When he smiled like that and looked at me with so much happiness, I remembered why I had given him a chance back then. He was cute, he always was, but not he looked more mature, his jawline was more defined and looked rather handsome. But he wasn't Dimitri and since the day Dimitri stepped into my life I couldn't help but compare every other male to him and nobody compared to him!

So even if Mason was a handsome young man now, beside Dimitri he looked like a child. I didn't mean this in a bad way, it's just how I see him now, it's like he transformed into some sort of younger brother version for me over night.

“Just … Nothing”, I replied.

“When is Eddie coming again?”, Mason asked and sipped on his coke.

“3pm, Mase, you know that”, I chuckled.

“Just wanted to make sure you're still here with me”, he smirked.

“Ass”, I mumbled and punched his shoulder lightly.

“Come on Power girl”, Eddie shouted when he entered like he owned the place.

Mason laughed at my face and I just glared at him.

“Shut up”, I grumbled and went over to Eddie.

Training was great. Every time I ran or fought with Eddie my mind was set on autopilot and all my thoughts faded away. Those hours were pure bliss and the highlight of my day.

*Another 3 days later*

The weekend, to days to relax and just do nothing. Of course my friends tried to meet me or come to the apartment, so I wouldn't be alone, but I never let them up or picked up the phone. I was sick of the non stopping “keeping Rose thoughts off of Dimitri”-thing.

So I told my friends I wanted to be on my own at the weekend, and I told my parents I did something with my friends. My mum would freak out if she knew I was alone in this big apartment.

I didn't even know what all the fuss was around, it wasn't a big deal for me to be alone. Before the whole “being married to one of the most wanted bachelors in New York”-thing happened, I had no friends and was always alone, because my parents had to work all the time. I was used to it. Sure, it was different now, but not that different and I wasn't five anymore!

“Rose?”, asked Rachel.

I was currently curled up in a ball on the couch in the living room, watching reruns from some show. I had no clue what is was about, but I honestly didn't care.

“Yeah?”, I asked.

“There is someone in the lobby who wants to see you”, Rachel informed me.

“Thank you, Rachel”, I sighed. “But I don't want to anyone.”

“Rose”, Rachel replied. “It's Mr. Belikov.”

For a split second I thought she meant Dimitri, but then I remembered that this was actually his apartment, so he would just barge in, not use the bell and wait for me to let him up.

“Dimitri's father is here?”, I asked a little unsure.

What the hell could he possibly want from me? And would he visit me and not call or something. Wasn't he the business man whose time was worth a fortune?

“I'm afraid so”, Rachel sighed.

I giggled.

“Oh my gosh”, Racheld gushed. “I'm sorry, I shouldn't have said that, that was out of line.”

“Don't worry, it was funny”, I giggled. “Could you open up for him, please? I think I need to make myself look more … presentable.”

I grinned at her and she smiled back. I was still in my pj's, so I definitely needed to change for his almighty Lord Belikov. But because I didn't really like Mr. Belikov, I didn't put much effort into my outfit, I searched for a pair of light blue jeans, a white top, a black blazer over it and black heels That was it. When I made my way down the stairs, I saw Dimitri's father waiting by the door.

“Rose”, he greeted me curtly.

“Mr. Belikov.”

Oh I wished I had called him dad, just to annoy him, but he didn't deserved to be called something so loving.

“I need to speak to you and my son, do you have a minute?”

It was like a pang in my chest, like a slap to my face, reminding me that Dimitri wasn't here. Honestly, I wasn't sure if Dimitri's father really didn't knew that Dimitri was gone or if he wanted to hurt me and show me that I wasn't living in a fairytale, but was only a girl he payed and could control as he pleased.

“Your son isn't here”, I replied in a voice I didn't recognize at mine. “Can I help you?”

“Yes, you can”, he nodded. “Tell my son what I'm going to tell you now. There is a gala tomorrow and I need you both there. Dimitri will start in my business soon enough so he needs to start meeting important people and behaving like an adult, as do you. Clothes will be delivered and a limo is picking you up at 7pm. See you tomorrow night, Rose.”

He gave me a curt nod and turned around.

“Wait”, I called.

“What?”, he asked, already one foot in the elevator.

“Dimitri has been gone for a few days now and I don't think he will magically appear today.”

“He will be there tomorrow, Rose”, Mr. Belikov replied. “Trust me, he won't dare disappoint me.”

And with that he turned around and got into the elevator.

“I expect you to be there Rose”, he said in his serious business voice. “Otherwise our deal is canceled and I will throw your parents out of their house.”
And before I could utter a word the doors slit closed and left me gaping after the devil reincarnated.

-o-o-o- Thrown Into His World -o-o-o-

“Are you finished now?”, Mason shouted annoyed.
“No!”, I laughed.

“How about now?”, Mason shouted chuckling.

“You're the worst plus one, ever”, I shouted back laughing.

I put my second earring on and looked at myself in the mirror. I was wearing a dark blue dress, it almost reached the floor I was walking on and without the heels to it, I would have stumbled over the material. The dark color did wonders to my skin and I looked thinner than I was. I liked it.

“Okay”, I said while I opened the bedroom door. “I'm ready to go.”

I didn't believe Dimitri would turn up tonight. Why would he? And even if he came back tonight, he wouldn't be at this gala, because he didn't know about it. So I asked Mason to accompany me, so I didn't have to go alone. Originally I wanted to ask Eddie, but he told me he was going with Jill, which surprised m after Jill's speech of Eddie not wanting her, because he talked about Jill like she was everything to him. I needed to talk them both alone to get this straight.

“Wow, Rose”, Mason awed. “You look incredible.”

“Thanks”, I smiled. “You don't look so bad yourself.”

“Why, thank you”, Mason replied his nose high in the air.

“Come on”, I giggle and shook my head.

The limo was huge and extremely comfortable. I was glad Mason accompanied me to this thing, because he was so much fun to be around. I just hoped I didn't need to meet too many people tonight, because most of them wanted to meet Dimitri, not me.

When the limo stopped and the chauffeur told us we arrived at our destination Mason and I exited the limo surprisingly elegant. But the moment I laid eyes on the building we were supposed to go in, I stopped dead in my tracks and my eyes went huge.

“Wow”, I breathed.

“Wow, indeed”, Mason whispered beside me.

While we two ogled the scene in front of us, the paparazzi made hundreds of photos of us. Only seconds later I heard the reporters shout their questions.

“Rose, where is Dimitri?”

“Are you cheating on Dimitri?”

“Are you already divorced?”

“Is this the father of your baby?”

“Have you dumped Dimitri for this boy?”

When Mason and I were inside and could give our coats to someone, I apologized at least ten times for the paparazzi, but Mason waved me off and smiled it all away.
“I'm hungry”, Mason announced. “Come with me?”

“Of course, I'm not going to stay here alone”, I replied with wide eyes.

These business women and men would eat me alive and spit my earrings out, because they were a gift from my mum to my sixteenths birthday and cost around 20$ which was a hell of a lot for me back then for a pair of earrings! And I loved them, because they were way to expensive back then, but my mum knew I fell in love with them the moment I saw them and bought them for me. Best birthday gift ever!

Mason took a plate and filled it with everything available and ate it within seconds. After Mason was full, we made our way into an even bigger room. There were tables everywhere, but these sort of high tables you only stood before and could your drink place on, so there were no chairs. On every table were candles and on the alls were paintings some people looked at.

Mason and I looked around and suddenly Mason tensed beside me. Frowning I turned towards him and followed his eyesight and who he was looking at.

I couldn't believe my eyes when I saw him. And without any thinking my body functioned and my feet ran towards him. At first he didn't see me, but then he and the men he was talking to heard my heels clicking on the expensive floor and turned around. And then, finally, finally my arms enveloped the tall frame of my husband.

“Dimitri”, I breathed out.

“Hi Roza”, he answered and gave me a short hug.

But it wasn't a normal hug. Normally he would tighten his arms around me, kiss my head or at least press my body to mine. But this time he only wrapped his arms loosely around me and let them fall back to his sides almost instantly.

“I missed you”, I mumbled into his chest, so only he could hear me.

Because I didn't let go of him, it wasn't possible, I just couldn't let him go again. I wasn't able to do that.

“Roza, stop”, he said and pushed me away from him.

Frowning I looked up at him. What the hell?, I thought. What was wrong with him, he was practically missing for two weeks and now he treated me like this?!

“Dimitri -”

“Woman, huh?”, Dimitri interrupted me and grinned at the other men in the circle.

The chuckled together with Dimitri. Did he just really make fun of me?

“Dimitri, I -”

“Rose, not now”, Dimitri said again.

He smiled down at me, but I could see clear anger in his eyes and his jaw was clenched. He was angry at me? Why? What the hell had I done?

“Sure”, I snapped shrugging. “What do I care?”

I stalked back over to Mason, who of course asked what that whole deal was about, but I didn't want to talk about that, I was too angry.
I didn't understand Dimitri, I didn't even know why I was angry or if I was angry at Dimitri or myself or these stupid business men or this whole fucking gala event! I just knew I was angry!

“You look like you want to strangle someone”, Mason mused.

“I do”, I growled.

“Wow, wow, wow”, Mason said and hold his hands up in surrender. “I'm not volunteering.”

And even if it was a stupid joke, it brought a little half smile to my face and some of the tension went from my rigid muscles.

“How about that guy?”, Mason asked and nodded towards a man I didn't know.

He was currently talking to a woman that was at least 20 years younger than him, but flirted right back. They looked really cozy and were just about to leave.

“20 bucks she isn't his wife”, Mason said, now standing beside me, hands in his pockets.

“Why not?”

“He has a ring, she doesn't, duh”, Mason answered.

“Smart-ass”, I giggled.

“You knew that already”, Mason praised himself. “So why not strangle him? I bet he deserves it.”

Giggling I shook my head, no matter how angry or upset I was, Mason was able to bring a smile to my face. For a while Mason and I just stood side by side and watched the old man flirt with the young woman, probably cheating on his wife that was waiting at home.

“What did the big bad mean husband say that got you so angry?”, Mason asked all of sudden.

His tone was very calm and collected, way softer than before. He wanted to know, of course he did, but I didn't answer, just shook my head. The rest of the night I couldn't keep my eyes off of Dimitri, but I never got near him. He never even glanced at me, just talked to some business men. I had no idea what was going on here, why Dimitri behaved so … so strange.

Mason tried to distract me and to a certain level, he succeeded. But in the end I couldn't take the “cold shoulder” anymore.

“Mase, I'm going to get some fresh air”, I interrupted him.

He looked a little hurt, but nodded understanding. I thanked him with a hand on his arm and he smiled a little sadly. I left Mason behind me, I knew he would find Eddie or Eddie him, we had talked to him already an hour ago, so eventually Mason would get his company.

I took a deep breath when I went outside and felt a little better. The air smelt fresh and like grass. A little shiver went up my spine when the wind blew, but I didn't really care. I was standing on a small balcony and had a great view of the city.
It was almost midnight, the sky was dark with no stars. Well that was normal, in really big and bright cities, you couldn't see the stars, so that wasn't a surprise. I liked it that way, the only thing illuminating the dark sky was the almost full moon. I have no idea why, but I always loved the moon.

Suddenly arms snaked around my waist and a chin was placed on my shoulder. I let out a high shriek, which made Dimitri behind m chuckle.

“I missed you”, he chuckled and kissed my temple.

“Oh really?”, I snapped.

“Yeah”, he replied, not noticing my sour mood.

I pulled my arm back and hit Dimitri's chest with my elbow, so he let go of me and I could turn around and glare at him.

“Seriously?”, I asked.

“Rose, what's wrong?”, Dimitri asked genuinely curious.

“Are you fucking kidding me?!”, I screeched. “Only three hours ago I told you exactly that and you treated me like an annoying child!”

And then the soft and caring Dimiti vanished and he looked royally pissed and angry at me.

“Because you God damn act like one!”, he shouted back.

And then … silence. The only sounds we could here were the ones coming from the party inside. I looked at Dimitri and I didn't see anything like remorse, or regret. The only feeling I could see was anger, and it was directed towards me.

“What?”, I asked disbelieving.

I was acting like a child? What the hell, he disappeared out of nowhere and I was only welcoming him back, hell I only gave him a hug! He was damn lucky I didn't scream his head off for leaving me alone all this time!

“You heard me” Dimitri replied in a calm voice. “You are acting like a child.”

“Like – Like what? When?”, I asked bewildered.

When the hell had I acted like a child that could cause this kind of reaction out of him!

“Oh for example our little run from the paparazzi? First day at school?”

“You ran with me!”, I shouted back.

“Doesn't matter, you are acting like a damn child Rose and you're making yourself and me look bad. I have to take responsibility for your stupid behavior and I'm sick of it. You laughing and fooling around or this whole PDA thing!”

“I -”, I stuttered. “I thought you liked me the way I am.”

“I do”, he answered. “When we're alone or around our friends. Not in public. You can't act like this around other people.”

“Well Dimitri, this is who I am”, I replied pissed. “Take it or leave it.”

And with that I stormed away from Dimitri and tried to make my way back in. But the moment I wanted to open the door to get back inside, Mason came out of it.

“Oh Rose, I just wanted to look for you, Mrs Hastings wants to talk to us about -”

“You are here with him?”, Dimitri growled from behind me.

I could feel his hot breath on my neck, which surprised me, because I hadn't heard him follow me this closely.

“Belikov”, Mason nodded.

“I'm not talking to you”, Dimitri growled.

Dimitri's hands grasped my waist and turned me around so I faced him again.

“You're here with -”

“Yes, she is here with me, now get your hands off of her and let her go”, Mason interrupted him.

Oh God Mason, shut the hell up!, I thought, when I saw Dimitri's eyes darken with anger. I wasn't sure if Mason was incredibly stupid or brave.

“She is my wife and I expect you to leave us alone”, Dimitri countered. “Now.”

“Rose, do you -”

“It's okay”, I answered, but my eyes never left Dimitri's. “I'm gonna be there in a few minutes.”

“You sure?”

“Careful Ashford”, Dimitri growled. “It's not like she has any reasons to be with you, but there are tons for her to be with me.”

They both glared at each other, until Mason huffed and turned around, closing the door behind him with a loud bang. Dimitri glared at the closed door, until his glare was fixed on me.

Oh my, what now?

“You're here with Mason Ashford?”, Dimitri growled, and he said Mason's name like it was some disgusting thing to say.

“Yes.”

“Why?”

“Well, you weren't here and I didn't want to go alone!”, I threw in his face, but Dimitri wasn't faced at all.

It actually looked like he didn't care, his mask was back on. This stupid mask that showed no emotions at all.

“And you thought you could just replace me with him?”, Dimitri shouted. “Rose, I'm your husband and you can't go to an event with someone else by your side! What do you think will all the others think? What will the press think? Have you thought of that at all?”

I haven't. Why should I have? Dimitri wasn't there, I knew almost no one here, so I wanted someone I could actually talk to!

“That's the behavior I'm talking about”, Dimitri went on. “Things like this can't happen. Do you understand? And to top it all of with Mason Ashford? Really Rose? You can't be seen with a low life like him, he isn't suitable for us. He -”

“What?”, I snapped. “What did you just say?”

“I said he isn't suitable”, Dimitri repeated word for word. “You can't be seen with someone like him.”

“Someone like him?”, I repeated. “You mean someone who isn't rich? You mean someone like me? You know what, I actually thought two weeks ago something changed between us, I was actually stupid enough to think you may have changed for the better, but this. This shows me I was wrong. You're still the stuck up rich asshole I always thought you were!”

I pushed against Dimitri's chest so he would let me go. His touch, his smell, his eyes, I couldn't take it anymore, I needed to get away, I needed to get away from all of this! This was all growing over my head, I had no control over anything anymore, every thing was running out of my hands!

“You can't leave me here alone!”, Dimitri shouted after me.

“Watch me!”, I screamed right back.

And the door shut behind me. For a moment I just stood there and had no idea what to do. But then I heard Dimitri's footsteps coming towards the door and I ran away. No idea where I ran, I just did.

The party was still in full spring and most people didn't even notice me running away from my husband, so no one stopped me from my escape. Suddenly I was out of the room and silence engulfed me, but I didn't stop, I ran and I ran and I ran away.

When I saw the sign for a ladies room I stormed into it, barely making it before I puked my guts out.